Owen's Birth Story- Mom's Perspective

On Friday, April 12, I was three days past due, which doesn't seem like much, but if you've ever been pregnant and overdue you know it seems like a lifetime and that possibly the baby will never arrive. I went for an early morning walk around a small pond near our house, which I had been doing each day since being off work, had a leisurely morning at home, and took an afternoon nap. In the late afternoon I felt some contractions/cramps, but they weren't painful, just a little uncomfortable and I couldn't tell when one started or ended. That evening before dinner I took another 1.5 mile walk for good measure, I was overdue and ready to meet our baby boy, maybe I could walk him out of me? That evening we went to dinner where I continued to have mild contractions and thought this baby we have been so patiently waiting to arrive may be arriving soon, but I didn't realize how soon. 

That evening we went to bed about 11:00 p.m. and three and a half hours later, I woke at 2:38 a.m. on Saturday, April 13, with painful contractions. It didn't take long before we reached "511," i.e. contractions five minutes apart lasting one minute for at least one hour, which we previously learned was the magic combination when you should head to the hospital. When I say "it didn't take long" I mean within the first half hour I was having contractions that were lasting over three minutes with just four to five minutes between contractions. Andrew calmly rushed around the house getting everything ready to go (our bags were already packed) and loading the car, while I got dressed and packed my toiletries between the contractions. When I felt a contraction come on I would yell for Andrew and he would come and massage my lower back because that seemed to help tremendously with the pain. About 4:00 a.m. Andrew was convinced we should go to the hospital, but I didn't think it was possible since I thought for some reason I should be laboring at home for hours before we should go to the hospital, I definitely didn't want to get turned away. He called the hospital at about 4:15 a.m. and they agreed we should come in. But before we walked out the door between contractions I asked Andrew to help me make the bed. Andrew thought this was the most ridiculous thing I've ever asked. For some reason, I thought the baby should come home to a house where our bed was made. 

We arrived at Legacy Good Samaritan Hospital at about about 5:00 a.m. After the typical questions, blood withdrawal  and being hooked up to machines to monitor my and the baby's heart rates, my cervix was checked and I was about 4-5 cm dilated and 90% effaced. At this stage they called my clinic's on call doctor. I was disappointed the on call doctor was Dr. Miles instead of my OBGYN, Dr. Suzuki,  but I had yet to be disappointed with Bridgeview Medical Center and any member of their staff and had met Dr. Miles so knew I was in good hands. My fantastic nurse Jen asked what my goals were when she came on shift at 7:00 a.m. and I said that I would like to have a non-medicated birth; however, I wasn't opposed to an epidural. I didn't last long lying on my back, I found that position very uncomfortable. I spent some time managing contractions on a exercise ball, on my hands and knees and about 3 or 4 hours in the Jacuzzi hot tub with a jet focused right on my lower back. I'm thankful I chose to get into the tub. I was a little hesitant because it seemed like a lot of work to get in there and then I was going to be wet, but it was a really helpful way for me to manage the pain. My amazing husband played an integral role in my pain management by massaging or applying pressure to my lower back with every contraction and encouraging me every step of the way. I couldn't have done it without him. I didn't think it was possible, but I fell even more deeply in love with him the day our baby was born and each subsequent day watching him with our little bundle of joy.

At about 10:30 a.m. I started to really think about an epidural. I was worried that I was still in the beginning stages of labor and I wouldn't have enough energy to push when I needed to push. Being the fantastic nurse that she was, Jen said she would be happy to call anesthesiology for an epidural, but asked if I wanted to be checked because it was possible that I was really close.  In my mind I thought forget it, give me the epidural, but I looked at Andrew and he responded quickly saying "Knowing you, you would be disappointed if you got the epidural and didn't know how far dilated you were." I knew he was right, so I agreed to another uncomfortable cervical exam. Jen said I was 7 almost 8 cm (although I could have been 6 almost 7 and she told a white lie) and the cervix was super thin. I thought great, but commented that I didn't think I could take another 8 hours and have enough energy to push, especially considering the contractions were going to get stronger and more painful. Jen said she was confident that we were talking one or two hours, including pushing, and yes, the contractions would be worse and it could be longer, but most likely just a couple of hours. Also, she added that pushing is very hard, but most women find a lot of relief when they are able to push because you feel like you can do something with the contraction. So... I decided against the epidural and I'm happy I did. Dr. Miles checked me at about 11:30 a.m. and could feel my bag of water so she broke it. 

The next hour or so while I dilated from 7/8 cm to 10 cm enduring incredibly painful contractions, the six months of prenatal yoga I took came in real handy. I believe besides helping my body prepare for delivery, the instructor also helped me mentally prepare. I became a believe that your delivery experience is shaped by not just how physically "tough" you are, but maybe more so how mentally tough you are as well. You have to let go of control and trust that your body knows what to do. At each class my yoga instructor would inevitably say "Invite the contraction, don't fight it. With each contraction your baby is closer to being born." This is something I continuously thought of throughout the delivery. These words were what I focused on with my eyes closed through many of the horribly painful contractions.

Thankfully, it was finally time to push. Jen was right, I did find some relief. After 15 minutes or so Dr. Miles was a bit concerned because the baby's heart beat was plummeting during contractions so she and the nurses scurried to attach an internal monitor and got the vacuum ready just in case. Thankfully the internal monitor indicated everything was fine. I continued to push and about 45 minutes in I told everyone I had enough. I was done pushing.They all thought this was a bit funny and assured me that I was very close, they could even see the baby's hair. Andrew, Jen and Dr. Miles continued to encourage me and some how I found the strength to carry on. After delivery Andrew reminded me that towards the end, after a little pep talk I felt a contraction coming on and said in a voice that wasn't my own, "Okay, let's do this." After a total of 50 minutes of pushing (Jen confirmed it was 50 minutes, I felt like it was 2 hours), our perfect baby boy was born and I couldn't have been happier. All the pain and tiredness simply vanished as I held our new baby and Andrew kissed me on my forehead with tears in his eyes. We were a family. This baby was ours and we were in love. 

Owen's Birth Story- Dad's Perspective

The evening of Friday April 12th Tanya started to feel something "a little different". I thought that it might be a change in the Braxton Hicks contractions because I took 7 week child birthing class with my beautiful wife and I am now an expert on such things (I kinda was before as well). We decided to try the spicy food route, mostly because it helped settle the ongoing "what are we going to eat" debate. So off we went to the local Indian food place for dinner.   We ate, came home, watched a little Netflix, and headed to bed around 11. Tanya was still feeling something different, but they were far spaced and only slightly painful. At 2:30am I was awoken by her telling me "this is something different, and it hurts". I pulled out the contraction timing app and started charting. The first one I timed came at 2:45 and lasted 3min; the next 15min later. At 5am she was less than 5min in between and we packed up and headed to the hospital. I partially expected to be sent home, but we were admitted right away and settled into our room. The monitors confirmed that this was actually happening and away we went. The waiting was not too bad for me, but then I was not in horrible pain without medication every few minutes; I passed the time by running to get water, rubbing her back, and otherwise looking for things to do to help and keep me busy. The first nurse who checked us in was nice enough, but I don’t really remember her all that well. At shift change at ~7am we met Jen who would be our nurse during delivery (of course we did not know that at the time). Tanya’s plan was to give birth without medication, but she was flexible with that idea, not dead set on it, it was a matter of if the pain now was greater than potentially slower recovery and her dislike of the idea of a needle in her back. Staying in the bed was not comfortable for her, so we spent a lot of time with her sitting on an exercise ball like you would see at the gym with me putting pressure on her lower back. About 8am she moved over to the Jacuzzi tub in the room to see if that would relieve some of the pain which was mostly hitting her in the back between contractions (but not “back labor”). This did a lot for her, but also made me less useful to have around. Since I had not yet eaten I took the opportunity to run and grab a bite to eat and put the car away in long term parking.  I cannot for the life of me remember where I ate or what I had… but I guess that shows where my focus was. Tanya stayed in the tub for a good 3hrs, only getting out when the Dr. arrived and had to check her out. Everything was progressing along and she was now 6cm dilated and the baby was looking great on the monitors. 

Tanya was now in bed and the contractions were coming pretty quickly and based on the graph on the monitor, they were not subsiding in between. It was at this point that she told the nurse that she wanted to get the epidural. Her biggest concern was that she would be to worn out when the time came to actually deliver the baby, and if she got the drugs, she could rest. The nurse asked if she wanted to see how far along she was before making the decision. At this point Tanya asked me what I thought she should do. Now I had no idea, and her line of reasoning about being tired seemed valid; but I’m actually pretty happy with what I came up with… this is basically verbatim “Well, I don’t know how uncomfortable the checking is, but I do know that if you don’t do it, and you get the epidural that you will be second guessing the decision for a long time”.  She considered that for about 4 seconds, and agreed that she would be dwelling on it if she did not know where she was at before the drugs. Jen checked her and found that she was at 7, almost 8, and said that she would likely start pushing within the hour. That statement was kind of a shock to me for some reason as part of my brain thought maybe we would still be sent home; now it was really real. Tanya elected not to have the epidural.

The hour passed, and the doctor came again and checked her while the contractions worsened. As the Dr. was getting geared up Tanya started to feel the need to push.  My internal reaction was “holy $#@%, this is really happening”. The bottom of the bed was removed, a plastic catch sheet brought in, and the Dr. assumed the position as Tanya put her feet up in strips. At each contraction she would squeeze and sometimes almost break 2 of my fingers. In talking to everyone, she took on a different tone of voice than normal, I can’t describe it, but it was not her normal voice. She also became the group’s motivational speaker, saying things like “Ok, let’s do this”, or “Ok, ok, big push on this one”; it was incredibly endearing and made me even more proud than I thought possible. She pushed for 50min, which felt like 5 to me and 500 to her. Never once did she scream or cry, but there was a fair amount of noise. Each time the pain came she would just bear down, grunt like a weight lifter and push; it was amazing to watch.  Around this time the monitor was having a hard time reading his heart and the mood in the room shifted dramatically, for about 30 seconds it was all about medical jargon and scurrying nurses. They did an internal monitor, and luckily found that it was only a reading issue with the external, and that everything was still fine. A few more pushes and the Dr. said that she could see his head. Two things happened at this point, I was overcome by curiosity and strayed from her shoulder level as I had intended, and took a peak down south. I did not see everything, but I did see some little tufts of hair on the top of his scalp, I’m very glad I made the decision to look.  The second thing was Tanya announcing that she was quitting, she had had enough and was done with this birth thing. I told her that that probably was not an option right now, and the nurses kind of chuckled and told her to lay back, relax and breath. She lay back, took a few breaths, and the motivational speaker came out in her again; this time it was “Let’s do HUUUUUUU….” And she was back to pushing. 3 more big pushes and his head popped out, I also watched this happen, and it literally does pop out. Now the Dr. could help pull, and in moments he was free and angry. The cord was wrapped around him and there was some more commotion as they assessed it, but in the end they got him easily untangled and up to mom. Tanya seemed very surprised when they handed her the baby and just looked at me for a moment like “where did this come from”, I was so overwhelmed with pride for my wife and awe for my child that I started tearing up. At that moment I snapped his first picture. I leaned in and kissed my wife and new baby boy, realized finally that it really had happened and that I really was a dad.

Owen's 2nd Day Home

Just a few shots from the second day at home with our little guy.

His Dr. Evil face

Palm sized baby

Bain Family's first walk in the park

Evening photo shoot as Owen gets ready to eat

Look at me, I can lift my head.

What ya thinkin about?

And Now We Are A Family Of 3

At 13:04 on 04/13/13, we welcomed Owen Steven into our lives, all 7 pounds 3 ounces of him on his 20 inch body.  

His first minute of life on the outside.

My beautiful wife and our little bundle of joy

Peaking at all the commotion 

Getting checked out

He likes eating fingers

There was a bit of a poop incident which resulted in poop all over mommy and baby.

Big ol' feet, just like his dad had as a baby

Still kind of skeptical of this whole "outside" thing

Mamma and baby

A few moments before I got thrown up on for the first time (of many I'm sure)

Proud dad

My first diaper change EVER... I got some on my face

Video of him checking things out while in my arms

All set and ready to go home

Leaving room 570 and starting our new life with our new little boy

40 Weeks

Today is Pat's due date, YAY! It can't be long now. I had an enjoyable day. I went for about a 1.75 mile walk at 6:30 this morning (which took me about an hour since I'm now moving very slowly), went to lunch with Andrew, did a little shopping and got a facial. In celebration of Pat's due date, I also made chocolate dipped strawberries for Andrew to share with his co-workers. 

I continue to feel well, except for this annoying shooting pain from my thigh to my pelvis. I've occasionally been experiencing this for a few weeks, but now it is fairly frequent. It stops me in my tracks for a few moments. My doctor said it is probably Pat shifting himself onto a nerve. My next doctor appointment is this Thursday. My doctor said she typically doesn't like her patients to go more than about a week overdue so within about a week Pat should arrive. We are hoping for a speedy delivery and a very healthy baby.

Pat's Nursery

Finally the nursery is complete, well as complete as a nursery can be without the actual baby. For the past few months I've been working on a few DIY projects for the nursery thanks to Pinterest (what did DIYers do before Pinterest?). I knitted Pat a blanket, made the bed skirt, book sling, mobile, and curtains and decorated letters for the alphabet wall. My very talented sister made the "I Love you to the Moon & Back" art for Christmas. My friends Leon & Flora thankfully helped finish all the letters. My husband begrudgingly painted the wall grey and Pat's dresser/changing table white (you would have thought he was dying and he was even drinking beer while painting) and assisted with hanging the various items. It was really a team effort. We're very happy with how everything turned out, although Andrew admitted that he would have been fine with just putting tin foil on the windows and a Pack n' Play in the room and calling it good. 

Now we just need the baby...

Where credit is due:
Mobile
Crib Skirt 
Nursery Art 
Alphabet Wall Inspiration & Tutorial
Book Slings

And of course all of my fabulous friends and wonderful husband for their help.